Kansas State Board of Education Supports Alien Abduction Theory

Subject To Be Taught In High School Physics Class
Elliot Rosewater Reporting
(Kansas City, KS NCJ News) The Kansas Sate Board of Education has advocated the teaching of the Alien Abduction Theory in their high school physics curriculum. Citing the number of true believers as a "darn good enough" reason, the state plans to add it to the Fall 2006 classes.
In addition, the board rewrote the definition of science, so that it is no longer limited to the search for natural explanations of phenomena.
Plans are also underway to include leprechauns, the Easter Bunny, and Bigfoot in the state mandated science program.
"We are being very brave. We are brave enough to have all areas discussed," said board member Kathy Martin, a Clay Center Republican. "Students will be informed and not indoctrinated."
Mrs. Martin also added, "Some things are just too complex to explain without some divine intervention. Things like multiplication tables and long division. We're seeking alternatives, we're saying we just can't know. After all, isn't that what education is all about?"
If you have a supernatural event that you would like to see researched, contact the Kansas State Board of Education.

Microsoft Slashes Health Care Costs

Is Your Daughter a Drunken Slut? Take the Test
The high cost of therapy has prompted Microsoft to slash health care costs and seek more traditional methods of treating mental illness within their employees. Bill Gates has eliminated the high cost of therapy and has decided that if a worker has a problem they should just ask Ask Some Damn Fool rather than seeking expensive medical treatment. The advice may not be good, but it is free. Ask Some Fool is just another free service offered by NeoCon News.

Rumsfeld, Roche, BirdFlu, Tamiflu

D.O.D. to Mandate Flu Shots
NCJ News has learned that Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld, is a major stockholder in Gilead Sciences, the patent holder of the Tamiflu Vaccine. See what the D.O.D. is doing to secure your insecurity. Tamaflu hoax exposed...
US: Roche Bails Out for Top Army Job Amid Scandal
by Esther Schrader, Los Angeles Times
March 11th, 2004
WASHINGTON - Air Force Secretary James G. Roche, whose nomination to head the Army had been stalled in Congress since summer over a controversial $27-billion deal with Boeing Co. and an Air Force Academy sexual assault scandal, withdrew his name Wednesday from consideration for the post.
The 23-year Navy veteran and former Northrop Grumman Corp. official had been handpicked by Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld to take the Army's top civilian position, but his nomination languished in the Senate Armed Services Committee -- primarily because of resistance by Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.), who criticized as improper and wasteful the costly air tanker leasing arrangement with Boeing that Roche had supported.
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Monkey Trial Moves to Indiana, State House Monkeys on Trial

Yes Virginia there is a Santa Clause. Indiana Lawmakers are advocating mandatory Sun Worship by high school Astronomy students. Amidst pressing education disasters, some Indiana Legislatures have offered a unique approach. See what they are doing with Intelligent Design in the Classroom

Internet Free Speech Threatened

Free speech with regards to political commentary is coming under increased scrutiny and federal regulation if certain lawmakers get their way. See how they want to further erode your First Amendment Rights.